Everyone is nervous on a first date – who wouldn’t be?
There are so many things to consider. For an older gentlemen, his experience with love probably hasn’t been the smoothest in life, whether he was unwilling to settle for any one woman, or whether he has felt hurt or let down by someone in the past. He may have not been out with a woman in quite some time, or if he has, grown disenchanted with meeting women who do not behave up to his standard, or are not eligible for him to have as a long term partner.
With a respected service like DateThaiLadies.com, there is nothing to worry about. Everything is taken care of ahead of time to ensure that the women you are meeting are eligible for your partnership, that they are the same women you have been speaking to before your arrival in Thailand, and that all their photos to you are accurate and up to date. With all this uncertainty out of the way, here are ten topics you can take with you to talk about on your first date.
Rule #1 On Your First Date: Ask her questions.
Like any good job interview, you know things are going well when the person interviewing you is doing most of the talking. This works also on a date! By asking her questions you are not only learning about her, but you are also getting her to feel more relaxed and connected to you. Studies show that intimacy is fostered by self-disclosure. Enhance her attachment to you by asking her questions about herself. Don’t ask anything too deep and most importantly, do not be rude. Simply ask her questions about how she spends her time, activities she does with friends, if she likes her work, and if she has any hobbies or pastimes that are exciting to her. Inside at least one of these should be enough to get the conversation flowing on a natural level.
Rule #2 On Your First Date: Listen actively.
There’s a difference between hearing and listening. Many people have lost the art of listening and will simply sit there and wait for their turn to speak! To avoid this problem and to build a real connection with the woman you’re talking to, try this simple method. Active listening means that you give two reflections, and one question as someone speaks. For example, a reflection is when you say, I notice that… or I hear you say… and repeat what they have said in your own words. A question is when you say, What happened next?, or Why do you think that is? It is a way of providing security within your conversation and coaxing the other person to reveal themselves to you, which promotes an intimate connection.
Rule #3 On Your First Date: Family and friends.
In high context cultures such as Thailand, who you are associated with is almost if not more important than who you are. Talk about your family! Your date is already impressed that you are from an English-speaking country and have come here all the way across a great distance simply to meet them! Tell them if you have brothers and sisters, what your parents do and what your siblings do, and don’t be shy if you yourself aren’t impressed with your family. You never know what may interest or impress someone else. Be casual and informative, and be sure to ask her questions about her family life as well. Also, include friends! For many people, friends are just as much if not more important to family for their social support and well-being.
Rule #4 On Your First Date: Try to stay out of religion or politics.
We tend to talk a lot about religion and politics, but the truth is that these topics usually end up dividing people rather than bringing them together. Give yourself some room to get to know her on a personal level before you bring up derisive issues that you probably won’t have equal knowledge about or necessarily agree upon right away.
Rule #5 On Your First Date: Be curious about Thailand.
Thai culture holds a peculiar elegance and has evolved over thousands of years. A Thai woman will hold a great amount of knowledge about her traditions that will be of great interest to you since not only have you come to Thailand, but you are taking the lengths to form a bond with its country and people. Ask her anything you are curious about! Thais love to explain to foreigners about the delicate and gentle customs that keep social life flourishing and provide people with a sense of well-being not experienced in most of the modern world today.
For example, did you know that Thais use forks and spoons different? A fork is never placed in the mouth. Instead, the fork is used to place food onto a spoon before it is eaten from the spoon. This is so the fork can be used to retrieve food from common plates throughout the whole meal, and is helpful when eating noodles or rice.
Small tips like this will make your first date amused and happy that you are interested to becoming a polite participant of Thai customs and culture.